Post by Old Bucks Admin on Apr 23, 2011 5:28:41 GMT -5
Week 14 confirmed what everyone had long suspected: that Old Bucks hockey was stuck in a rut, its freshness and spontaneity having given way to the habit of half the club always wanting to wear Red and the other half always wanting to wear Blue. The “powers that be” met in emergency session and decided as follows: from now on every week the teams will be decided based on a theme rather than on Kenny’s sayso. The theme for Week 15 will be politics. That means that everyone who votes Democratic (or yanks their shots to the LEFT) will wear Blue and everyone who votes Republican (or can only do RIGHT-handed crossovers) will wear Red. This will not only mix up the teams but explore the myth of whether Republicans are all macho he-men in the mold of Arnold Schwarzenegger and whether Democrats are all pusillanimous wimps in the mold of people not worthy of being named here. The Republicans will have a brass band on hand that will crash out “Hail to the Chief” every time they score a goal and the Democrats will have the choice of wearing any one of the following campaign buttons: “We love Hillary”, “Obama is the Guy for Us”, or “Kucinich for King”. Locker rooms will be segregated based on party affiliation and their doors marked accordingly. Because Marty is an anarchist he will automatically skate with Blue. Independents can join Huck Fairman in the scorer’s box and heckle. Cowboys fans can stay home and watch their team get smoked by the Giants.